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My re-reading of the sex manuals, some in newer editions, confirms what Lewis and Brissett wrote over ten years ago, and also suggests that men are still believed to be the sexual experts, who should be able to guide, instruct, and educate their women into better sex, provided the woman is complaisant, relatively receptive, and ready to be instructed.
They also imply that although sex can be seen as work it is also pleasurable, which most work often is not. This creates a dilemma in the mind of some men who place a high value on work and a lower value on pleasure. It seems morally wrong to them to devote much time to a pleasurable activity, when so much ‘real’ work needs to be done. The files brought home from the office have to be read; the boat has to be painted; the car has to be washed; the lawn has to be cut; the rubbish has to be put out; exercise – golf, tennis, squash, or jogging – has to be taken; the children have to be watched playing organized sport; and sex is relegated to something done when all these important matters have been completed. The result may be that the man only reaches sex when he is tired, or has other things on his mind. He does not want sex for mutual enjoyment but only to get rid of his sexual tension and if necessary to satisfy his partner as quickly as possible.
*125/16/1*
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